Tetris Adaptation Begins Filming in China Next Year

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In what can only be described as a one of the biggest head scratching decisions of the year, the cinematic adaptation of the classic video game, Tetris, will begin filming in China sometime next year. This will include a cast of both Chinese and American actors, as well as have Larry Kasanoff as one of the producers. Kasanoff credits include several forays into adapting both Lego and Mortal Kombat properties onto the big and little screens.

Though the project has been promoted to be an epic science fiction adventure, there is a lingering question on the minds of many. Why?

Why is this being done?

Why would anyone consider Tetris, of all games, to make into a movie?

Why would anyone think of putting large amounts of capital into producing this?

This isn’t to say similar films have not fared well, but let’s be real here. Most of them are just terrible. Need I remind everyone of the recent classic that is Battleship? There are some games that beg to be brought onto the silver screen. Games that pull us into the story and never let us go, even after we overcome the final quest or boss.

But this? This is a game of blocks. Literally.

I love Tetris, and I’ve wasted more hours than would likely be recommended for one’s mental health. But I see this as a train wreck waiting to happen. No, I take that back. This is a Titanic disaster waiting to happen. What scares me, personally, is that there’s eighty-million dollars being thrown into this project. I repeat, 80 million dollars. I’ll let that sink in for a second.

Granted we haven’t seen any trailers, images, or even conceptual drawing to show us what this is going to be. But I would not be surprised if this doesn’t lead to a major loss for a few of the people pouring their money into this thing.

Seth Frederiksen
A post-grad history buff who is addicted to comics and books, and lover of anything with the words "ice" and "cream" in it. I've been a huge Batman fan since I can remember, and have come to appreciate sequential art as literature and entertainment. Also I have a soft spot for dogs. Just saying.

2 COMMENTS

    • I truly wish this was an Onion style story. But this is real, so very…very real.

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