Ridiculous News of The Day: ‘Memento’ Getting a Remake

In today’s theater of the totally absurd, it seems Christopher Nolan’s mind-twisting noir, his breakout film Memento, is getting a remake. I shit you not.

According to the news, broke by The Hollywood Reporter, AMBI Pictures is handling the remake of the seminal Guy Pearce thriller. This relatively unknown studio recently purchased the rights to Exclusive Media Group’s 400-film library including Cruel Intentions, Rush, Donnie Darko, and, yes, Memento. It seems AMBI, run by Andrea Iervolino and Monika Bacardi, will kick things off by dragging this film through the mud.

In a statement, Bacardi discussed their intentions:

Memento is a masterpiece that leaves audiences guessing not just throughout the film, but long after as well, which is a testament to its daring approach. We intend to stay true to Christopher Nolan’s vision and deliver a memorable movie that is every bit as edgy, iconic and award-worthy as the original. It’s a big responsibility to deliver something that lives up to the mastery of the original, but we are extremely excited and motivated to bring this puzzle back to life and back into the minds of moviegoers.”

They should have simply ended the statement after “Memento is a masterpiece,” then walked away from the project, out of whatever room they were in, driven to the bank, called their lawyers, and sold back the 400 film titles they acquired. Memento does not need any sort of remake, no matter how “true” they stay to it. In fact, if they stay true to the film, there really is zero point in this. The creative bankruptcy in Hollywood has reached a new summit, and I’m sure more bizarre and inexplicable decisions will be on the way from AMBI.

Let’s just hope Goodfellas wasn’t in that 400-film library.

Larry Taylor - Managing Editor
Larry Taylor - Managing Editor
Larry is the managing editor for Monkeys Fighting Robots. The Dalai Lama once told him when he dies he will receive total consciousness. So he's got that going for him... Which is nice.