Amazing Spider-Man #675
Writer: Dan Slott
Art: Giuseppe Camuncoli [pencils], Klaus Janson [inks] and Frank D’Armata [colors]
Last issue saw the return of the Vulturions. If you can remember way back to the ’80s, they were those annoying little bastards that did all of the Vulture’s work for him.
Well, the new Vulturions are goofy-looking goth kids who nobody seems to want to refer to as Vulturions. They’re still causing trouble in this issue, at least until Spidey runs into them.
And even HE doesn’t make a Vulturion reference or wisecrack.
DAN SLOTT! WHY HAST THOU FORSAKEN ME?!?!
Anyways, I’ll overlook that…for now. In Amazing Spider-Man #675, Slott concludes his ‘return of the original Vulture’ story with a team-up in the mighty Marvel manner, as the Amazing Spider-Man teams up with…his recent ex-girlfriend Carlie Cooper.
It works, though. The dialogue between Peter Parker (as Spidey) and Carlie (who ditched Pete after figuring out he was Spider-Man) carries all of the tension present between recently split couples — although most couples don’t involve a CSI detective and a guy with the proportional strength, speed and agility of a spider. Even the facial expressions convey an uneasy air when the two are interacting, which is a testament to Giuseppe Camuncoli’s absolutely gorgeous art and made all the more better by Klaus Janson and Frank D’Armata’s inks and colors.
The Vulture looks absolutely creepy in this story, as he should. I’m wondering, however, what happened to his wings? I know they were pretty much just for aesthetic purposes since the harness he wore used magnetic fields to keep him defying gravity and in “flight,” but he just looks weird and even creepier floating there with no “wings” attached to his arms.
Anyhow, I digress. This two-parter does a solid job of reintroducing O.G. Vulture, Adrian Toomes, and establishing him once again as a credible threat to Spider-Man — which is saying a lot, considering Toomes has to be an octogenarian at this point. I’m still wondering, however, what happened to the more recent Vulture that had the red suit, Predator-like mouth, and acid spit.
It’s hard to imagine he wouldn’t cross paths with Toomes or his delinquent goth mini-mes while they were pulling heists, but that’s probably a story for another time.
Its issue four for both books and Scott Snyder and Jeff Lemire continue to push the story of The Green , The Red and The Rot into a head on collision between Animal Man and Swamp Thing. This month both books show their hand a bit more as the plot begins to thicken and “flesh” out (pun intended). With out further adieu , lets begin the reviews.
Swamp Thing #4
Story by: Scott Snyder
Art by: Marco Rudy , Michel Lacombe , Sean Parsons
Review Score:9.5/10
After last issues introduction to The Rots new Avatar, William makes his way into the Rural town of Western Texas. Immediately Snyder shows us just how corrupted William has become from the Rot . All it takes is a Waiter to get the flavor of his Milkshake wrong and William goes all Damien from the Omen on the place. Snyder tells us exactly what Williams powers are now. Hes able to control and manipulate all forms of death and decay in this world. Which includes Tumors, abscess teeth, arthritis, you name it . Again Snyder doesn’t hesitate to amp up the gore while also managing to have fun in the process, showing the Diner in shambles and closing it out on a final panel that shows us that yes William did finish Milkshake before leaving . Scott Snyder creates a very morbid situation by giving a child this power , its small touches like this that add to the over all sense of macabre that he creates issue after issue .
We are then taken back to Alec Holland and Williams’ sister continuing their search for her disturbed brother. They end up discovering the carnage William left at the Diner and decide to get some rest before they continue their search for him in the morning. Alec starts to Dream and Snyder uses this opportunity to delve a bit deeper into the history of the Green and its continuous battle with The Rot. You get a sense that The Green may have some other motivations they are hiding from Alec . The Parliament of Trees continues to tell Alec that the girl he is with will be his undoing , but Alec’s former memories of her as Swampthing prevent him from taking her life. Page after page we are treated with amazing panels and splash pages showing us the war between both The Green and The Rot.
The art again continues to be one of the most amazing and consistent aspects of this comic. The shock here in this issue is that it is handled by three different artists this time around. Yannick Paquette is nowhere to be seen inside this issue but you wouldn’t be able to tell by how great these three artist are at emulating his style. Marco Rudy , Michel Lancombe , and Sean Parsons all put in amazing work and detail in issue 4. The dream sequences alone are nothing short of amazing and the use of plant foliage to break up the panels is back . Dino Zombies have never looked cooler. I especially was taken back by one page where both Alec and Williams’ sister are sleeping next to each other. His side full of foliage and vibrant colors and hers turning into barren land and ash. The most shocking thing here is that even with multiple artists in one issue , the art never suffers or severely changes from one style to another.
Alec chooses to follow his mystery woman towards William , however it seems William has found a perfect place to hide out at , Texas’s largest Meat processing plant aka Slaughter House. What this means for Alec , tons and tons of dead cattle heading his way next issue. What it means for us the readers , I’m willing to bet another great issue to Snyder’s already strong run.
Animal Man#4
Story By: Jeff Lemire
Art By: Travel Foreman
Review Score: 8.5 / 10
Who would have predicted that out of all of DC’s new 52 titles few would be as good as Animal Man has been over the last three issues . I’ve been consistently surprised with how fresh Jeff Lemire’s take on Animal Man has been.The Baker family are still split up during this issue, with both Maxine and Buddy inside of the Red and Buddy’s wife Ellen and son Cliff heading towards their safe house . The problem is the detective that’s driving them is actually one of the Hunter’s Three . Travel Foreman shows us as much by illustrating a peaceful drive down a scenic road while also showing us the whereabouts of the real Detective, who is stuffed in the trunk of said car.
Inside of the Red Buddy continues to battle the remaining hunters and is not doing so well . The Totems inside the Red tell Maxine she must step in to help and she does sending the Hunters out of the Red and healing her father from his wounds. We learn that the Hunters Three are former Animal Totems who were infected by The Rot and now are after Maxine who is the last remaining living Avatar. Lemire finally decides to bring Alec Holland into the mix and we are seeing the beginnings of the crossover both Scott Snyder and Jeff Lemire have planned for Swampthing and Animal Man.
Travel Foremans art continues to impress me . He has a sick sense of pacing and being able to capture emotion panel after panel. This is a comic that lives and breathes of creative art and page layouts . You get a sense that Foreman truly pushes himself to create something different you haven’t seen before . All the while managing to keep us not confused with what is happening on any given page .
At the end of the issue Maxine , and Buddy along with their new cat Socks are heading towards the remaining family members . This issue feels a bit too small for my liking but that’s because it’s just so Damn good. Next issue looks like it will be the end of the first chapter to what I’m hoping is a series that will last for years to come.
Warning: Pretty much everything in this article is a spoiler.
Part 1 – Captain Swing and many another thing
“Each time society, through unemployment, frustrates the small man in his normal functioning and normal self-respect, it trains him for that last stage in which he will willingly undertake any function, even that of hangman.” – Hannah Arendt
Captain Swing and the Electrical Pirates of Cindery Island ([amazon_link id=”1592911366″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]A 4-issue mini-series out this Wednesday in a collected trade![/amazon_link]) W: Warren Ellis, A: Raulo Caceres, Col: Digikore. I’m not giving this one a rating. I think I don’t like giving grades out.
The Swing Riots of 1830 began with the destruction of threshing machines in the southeast of England, by laborers whose livelihoods were displaced by them. If your job can be done by a machine, well, bosses don’t have to pay machines.
What has this to do with Warren Ellis’s just-concluded series Captain Swing and the Electrical Pirates of Cindery Island? Everything. The series as a whole, for me, was not a very exciting narrative, despite the appearance within of this guy:
I'm thinking that he's probably a poor lover.
BUT, as for its subtextual meaning and present relevance, the series gains in excitement with analysis. Ahhhh, not really. Actually, my analysis reads like I’m repurposing a college paper or something, it sucks THAT MUCH. But what the heck, you’re already here, give it a scan, okay? I’ll try to spice it up somehow.
The conflict at the heart of this story is that of the titular Captain and his collective fighting against an empowered cabal over the use of energy itself. Here, I’ll let Swing’s first mate Hobbes explain it for me:
Dumbfuck! Pay attention! The REAL subtext is that Warren Ellis is trying to advocate for corporal punishment in schools.
On Cindery Island, there’s a voluntary collective – a commune, if you will – where the “pirates” work to produce the devices whereby the Captain and his men produce their electrical wonders. Those there, essentially, are each given what they need and each produce according to their abilities. [YAWN, right? It gets better, eventually.] This comic is a piece of agitprop intended to tweak the minds of the workers of the world right now, at this delicate moment when it appears that the cabal of the ultra-wealthy and ultra-powerful have achieved final victory. The “Occupy” movements now growing are all pirates in Captain Swing’s crew; As the pool of persons who feel in control of their destiny dwindles, so does the group of those willing to act outside of the confines of polite society grow.
In my dark moments, I have pessimistic and prophetic fever dreams about the future of the U.S.A. Some of these are inspired by President Barack Obama and his seemingly idiotic insistence on continuing to try to cooperate with the Republicans in Congress. I am especially mortified at his failure to roll back Dubya’s tax cuts for the wealthy, at a time when we continue to become a desperate debtor nation. Obama, for me, has been the tipping point that’s convinced me that institutional change in America will not come about through political means. Rather, I am convinced that the middle class will continue to be squeezed, salaries frozen as the cost of living continues to rise. Layoffs continue too. More and more of us will be desperately clawing at one another’s flesh just to cling to the few scraps left in our hands, until finally and inevitably there is a breaking point and French Revolution II: Guillotine Hootenanny comes to the land. Change will be instituted after billionaires are dragged from their mansions by angry mobs and murdered in the streets, along with their heirs. I sincerely believe that it would take measures that drastic to convince our owners that, hey, we’re all in this together, so they should maybe go back to paying their share. Occupy Wall Street is a seed. That seed may yet grow into a tree watered in the blood of our oppressors. Or maybe not, it’s all just speculation. As a lifelong comic-book reader, I’m convinced that violence is not the answer. Yeah.
Getting back to the boring part, Warren Ellis does a few other things in this series which so far confound my analysis. Why does Captain Swing have the same name – John Reinhardt – as another Ellis creation, Doktor Sleepless? Uh, maybe he’s a Tulpa that the Doktor sent back in time? Works for me! Is the story’s protagonist, our POV character Charlie Gravel, an ancestor of “combat magician” William Gravel, another Ellis hero? Ya got me. Maybe Ellis is trying to build some kind of connected universe that helps move the back-catalogue. Why is the masthead of Swing’s ship an image of a winged snake springing from a woman’s head?
No woman's head appears in this image, sorry.
Winged snakes are often meant as symbolic of Quetzalcoatl, the Aztec patron god of learning and knowledge (he also invented the calendar, and taught the Aztecs how to grow corn!), so that’s half the idea parsed, I guess. Quetzalcoatl is also the “white god” whose predicted return was (purportedly) the linchpin upon which Moctezuma took an ass-pounding when Cortez came. I suspect that that further ironic meaning is not intended here, but I hate to let Quetzalcoatl factoids go to waste. My only tattoo is a bust of Quetzalcoatl, is why. Or, hell, maybe it’s supposed to be Glycon, just because everybody likes to needle Alan Moore.
Part 2 – Hickman and me and Huitzlopochtli makes three!
The Red Wing ([amazon_link id=”1607064790″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]A 4-issue mini-series available in, uh, 3 weeks. 2 days AFTER Christmas. What’s the use of THAT?[/amazon_link])
Jonathan Hickman: Writer, Nick Pitarra: Artist, Rachelle Rosenberg: Colors. Nobody lettered it, but yet there are letters within! Spooky!
I bet they had to go to the store over and over to keep getting white ink.
This series’ plot: Humanity is waging a war fought via time travel against a mysterious, also-time-traveling enemy intent on strip-mining the entire planet. Our two main characters, Valin Redd and Dominic Dorne, both lost their fathers to this very war, and we begin as they enter the same military branch that took their fathers: the titular Red Wing. The weapons here knock out your ship’s time shielding, and the resultant “chronal shear” causes cool-looking deaths like this:
This shit gets old fast.
Near the beginning of issue #1 of this series, it says: “TIME IS NOT LINEAR” and then “THERE IS NO PARADOX”. Near the end our protagonist, Dom, flies off into the past and/or the future with his military commander, a man who is Dom’s son, or maybe Dom’s father, or maybe both. That sounds like a paradox, right? The way I figure it, Hickman put that there just to try to keep Harlan Ellison from suing for story credit. (If you get that joke, say so in the comments. This is a contest! Whoever posts the explanation first, I will declare them to be King Shit of Fuck Island! This honor is more coveted than the Pulitzer Prize among people who don’t know what money is.) The two male leads are given ironic names. Valin (like a dyslexic villain?) is brave and heroic, while Dom is meek and uncertain. The female lead is named “Maye,” a name loaded with possibility. The military head of command is named General Dadson Childefather. (Just kidding about that one. He’s actually unnamed in the story.) The color red is associated, as in Morrison’s run of Batman comics, with life – “Red shift or Blue shift, Dom,” says Maye, “… Life or Death.” Valin’s last name IS Redd. Dom’s last name, Dorne, has red in it, but it’s all mixed up. It’s also an anagram for “no red.” HEAVY.
In addition to the wordplay above, the series is positively loaded with circles. The military HQ of our heroes is “The Ring,” a space station in Earth orbit that literally encircles the entire planet, it seems. Planetside, the buildings have circles throughout their architecture. There are silos in the middle of the friggin’ military aircraft hangar of the Red Wing. There might not be a single page of this comic without a circle somewhere on it. Is time a straight line?
Um, blue is the color of death. Thanks loads, General Bummer!
Can you spot the hidden circles on this page? (I think the wall hanging is some sort of calendar. Wait, I just felt deja vu. Hm.)
War? They were the band with the songs "Low Rider," "The Cisco Kid," and "Spill the Wine." Don't tell me you haven't heard ANY of them...? Hey, that helmet looks a bit like a snake head.
And last but not least, the logo of the series is a snake eating its own tail – what we call an Ouroboros. Just like the bad-guy in Grant Morrison’s Batman run! Looky here:
Kinda looks like a dog's head, which makes total sense.
THIS particular Ouroboros (different cultures have different ones) looks to me to be Mayan or Aztec in style. That adds up, because Dom’s presumed-dead father, Robert Dorne, is actually the guy on the left in the picture above holding his finger up and teaching the native Mesoamerican about irrigation and war. Say, you know who the Mesoamerican Ouroboros is? Quetzalcoatl! Huh, that’s a coincidence. Two separate miniseries by different authors that ran and ended about the same time, each with a Quetzalcoatl connection, each reviewed by a guy with a picture of Quetzalcoatl tattooed on his back. Nutty. Well, I’m sure there’s nothing more to come on that subject… heh heh heh…
So, Robert Dorne is chilling with his buddy Itzamna up there, when suddenly, his beacon beeps! Awesome! So he checks it out…
Aw, dag! Blue shift equals death! ULTIMATE BUMMER!
… And gets captured by the mysterious enemy. The leader of the enemy? Dun dun DUN! His son, Dom! Now, we get to the meat of the series, with exchanges like this one:
By his knee is a circle. THAT circle is the important one, the one that reveals the secret of what this whole series is about. Come on, look harder! Aw, poo, my wife read this and says that I shouldn't lie just to eff with readers. Sorry. Again.
Science fiction is an ideal vehicle for allegory, because you can pile on names that are odd and are anagrams for other things and you can plop circles on top of circles and put the bad guys in crazy spiky space suits, and this stuff is all window dressing. It’s sleight-of-hand, where we’re looking in the hand with all of the circles in it but missing the hand with the moral. This story is about us. Humans, you and me, right now, are literally using up every resource in the world with only the most cursory gestures towards future generations. THAT is what this story is about. Hickman isn’t saying that the reader is Dom – the reader is Robert – and he’s giving us a much-deserved sock in the chops!
Now, I shouldn’t dismiss the devices in the story so readily. The Moebius strip construction is of value as entertainment – hey, if you’re planting subtext, it has to be under text, right? Although, actually, the subtext is the Quetzalcoatl stuff – I’d call the central allegory the sub-subtext, but I might just be too concerned with labeling.
BY INVENTING THE SPIKY HELMET!
Except… except, when Dom zapped his dad into his blue ship from the Mayans, a legend was created around Robert. A legend that the Aztecs appropriated from the Mayans as they assimilated Mayan culture. The legend of the White God whose return was foretold until Hernan Cortez came and was taken to be Quetzalcoatl, and he wiped the hell out of the Aztecs and made himself a mega-excellent symbol of the conquest of the Americas, homeland of the most wasteful, consumerist society in the history of the Earth – CANADA! Just kidding, actually it’s THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA! So, really, Dom did some total self-fulfilling prophecy shit there. Nice going, numb-nuts!
All right, my cuckoo analysis has a few holes in it – Mexico and the USA are NOT, in fact, interchangeable for purposes of allegory. Also, the whole “Cortez is Quetzalcoatl” thing is a bunch of horseshit, originating at least 50 years after the Spaniards’ conquest of Central America. I didn’t know THAT when I got the frickin’ tattoo. Still, as Grant Morrison or Alan Moore might say, all stories are true, right? Jon Hickman, aided wonderfully by Nick Pitarra and Rachelle Rosenberg, has crafted a beautiful humdinger of a story here. Here’s hoping that THIS one grows in esteem as time goes by.
Note: This review contains a major spoiler, if you haven’t read the issue yet, you probably shouldn’t read this yet. Unless you don’t care about that sort of thing.
Last we left off in the Ultimates, Jonathan Hickman has been picking up the pieces of Jeph Loeb’s mess that he made of Ultimate Thor, in the pages of the Ultimates. Thor who had been left powerless was given a redesigned version of his super soldier armor so that he could go on a suicide mission to stop the rapidly expanding City the Children of Tomorrow had built.
The issue starts off with a bang as Thor teleports directly into the city and begins fighting the Children of Tomorrow as he discovers them doing experiments on Ultimate Captain Britain, who he manages to save. Thor than presses on fighting, and finds himself beaten, only to discover who is the leader of the Children of Tomorrow (Which doesn’t get revealed to us quite yet, but more on that later.) Thor and Captain Britain get beaten pretty badly, and then the man hallucinated Odin and then all of Valhalla. Where he is told that he actually is Valhalla now. It ends with Thor and Captain Britain getting out alive, and giving Nick Fury, Hawkeye, a debrief, where he reveals to them and us that the man who is the “Creator” of the Children of Tomorrow, Ultimate Reed Richards.
Hickman has been doing a brilliant job cleaning up this mess. I actually am finding myself caring about the Ultimates again. I also am really enjoying the focus on Thor. Sometimes, I feel in the 616 the Norse speaking gets to be too much, and I find myself opting out of the book. I am very intrigued to see what Hickman has up his sleeve, and also stoked to see that Ultimate Reed is back, and what kind of psychotic plans he has for the City and the Ultimates.
Esad Ribic’s art has also been outstanding, his reveal shot of Reed was great, also loved the splash of Thor seeing Valhalla. This one is a must read, for any fan of the Ultimates, Ultimate Thor, and Ultimate FF.
The Haunt comic has been re-birthed with this weeks issue; welcoming new creative team consisting of Joe Casey and Nathan Fox. Here’s a quick recap of who the Haunt is, no spoilers, promise:
The Haunt is a symbiotic entity that consists of a former priest, Kurt Kilgore and his deceased brothers ghost, Daniel Kilgore, an ex-agent of a mysterious military group known solely as, “The Agency”. The Haunt’s power is within his ectoplasmic/malleable body, which can create constructs that seem to fit whatever the Haunt can imagine. The Haunt, in previous issues, worked for “The Agency”; helping to bring down the current kingpin of crime, Mr. Hurg. Other than Kurt Kilgore being a ghost and the recent introduction of “The Apparition”, the book has taken a real world approach to the stories and it’s characters. But with this new creative team, we seem to be jumping head first into the Other-Wordly.
The first couple pages introduces us to an avatar of chaos, obviously on some hell-bent mission to bring on an apocalyptic scenario to our not-so-seasoned protagonist, Haunt. His motives are unclear, but we understand he’s powerful and has a taste for destruction. This foe seems quite overwhelming for the Haunt, basing his actions from past events; Kurt and Daniel Kilgore have a lot to learn, in a short amount of time. There’s also a new demonic tone that Joe Casey brings, one that I was expecting from issue one. Though the idea was seeded throughout previous issue, the build-up was incredibly slow. So, this issue may be jarring to the senses, much to do with new artist: Nathan Fox. But truly, I’m excited to finally get into the thick of it and find out what a Haunt, really is.
Insert from #19 Art by Nathan Fox
The art style has radically changed (as mentioned above) with the coming of artist, Nathan Fox and colorist, FCO Plascencia. Fox’s pencils are relaxed with thick lines, which works good with the nature of Haunt’s power. The action can get quite confusing, which is understandable when bodies are being shredded apart, with the blood and all. FCO’s colors are rich and vibrant, making Fox’s imagery less hectic and more defined; the duo works well together. One thing that I truly did miss, were Greg Capullo’s splash pages! Honestly, most of his old splash pages, which were many, I used to think were a waste of space. Pretty? Sure. But a waste of space. Here, almost every other page I was expecting/secretly hoping, to find a sexy splash page of Haunt flipping in the air or of him flying above the city using wings constructed from his suit.
The Haunt series has just turned over a new leaf. One that was unexpected and hard to process, but a necessary one for the series survival. Hopefully new readers were drawnto the bitchen’ cover and hopefully old readers didn’t feel too lost. I for one, will be here for the next issue, as I’m interested in the direction Mr. Casey is going with the Haunt mythology.
Also, why was Daniel such a prick in this issue? You better have answers coming my way Joe!
Wolverine #19
Writer: Jason Aaron
Art: Ron Garney, Jason Keith (Colors)
So last issue, Wolverine (who has been moonlighting as the Black Dragon) and Gorilla Man were joined by the Immortal Weapon Fat Cobra in their underground adventure to get Wolverine’s money back. If you remember way back to two issues ago, they ended up underground after Kung Fu Master Po informed Wolverine of an underground (deep underground) drug smuggling ring, operated by Jade Claw, that was using dragons to traffic opium.
Are you still with me?
It’s a lot to take in, and it’s hard to wrap your head around at times, so maybe you should just leave your head at the door for this one if you didn’t figure out in issue 17 that this arc requires that.
Anyhow, at the end of the last issue, the odd trio were pulling a Trojan Horse move by sneaking their way into the Jade Claw’s underground compound in the bellies of dragons. Wolverine #19 begins with the trio emerging from beneath the ground in front of a bar, carried by a dragon, with Wolverine’s money. The rest of the issue is a flashback of the story’s resolution.
To sum it all up, there’s more fun dialogue interplay between Wolverine, Gorilla Man and Fat Cobra, and Wolverine’s journalist girlfriend Melita Garner gets a job at New York’s finest newspaper. Oh, and one of the D-list villains from last issue (whose name I’ve already forgotten…Soul Striker or something, right?) lets things get out of hand.
This arc was a fun read overall, but I prefer a little less cartoonishness in subject matter with Wolverine. When things get a little too supernatural/magical, like this arc and last year’s “Wolverine Goes to Hell,” things start to wear on me a little bit — although “Goes to Hell” did have a rewarding payoff. By comparison, this arc is lighthearted filler.
To be fair, though, Aaron has had a lot on his plate with the stellar X-Men: Schism event book this past summer and the new Wolverine and the X-Men ongoing series launching last month. This story basically served as a transition to Logan’s return to New York, and the upcoming arc involving Kingpin and the Hand seems promising.
Walking Dead had its mid-season finale Sunday night. Fans of the comic book have enjoyed the show but non-comic book readers have complained that the show has been slow.
I have enjoyed the show even though the this first half could have been just a single episode. The mid-season finale was very powerful but it could have been just as powerful in one episode. The problem with dragging out the farm-house plot for this long is viewers just wanted it to be over. What makes the Walking Dead comics so good is that almost every issue has a cliff hanger or a WTF moment. This season the WTF moments were very weak till the last episode but by that time I just wanted something to happen.
Walking Dead will return to AMC on February 12, 2012.
What do you think?
“Slow at times, but ending was great!” @ElDuceBrown said Charles Brown via twitter.
“Intense. Great. Finally. The past few weeks have been kinda boring.” said Mark Meads via facebook.
“Finally. One more episode of “try and find Sophia” and I was going to blow MY brains out.” @XSarahCoreX
said Sarah With An H via twitter.
Hello! Hopefully, you’ve seen and read our “Best-Of” column. If not, here’s a link. I’d like to point out that, in that article, all of our wonderful recommendations from this fantastic year in comics now have links so that you can buy the stuff we’re talking about – sometimes digitally, sometimes from Amazon, sometimes a bit of each. If you haven’t heard yet (from me) that I’m very close to shameless, well, now you have! Please enjoy your Black Friday shopping! Ach – BLACK FRIDAY! Black is the color of death. Black is also the color of a hole – an absence. You know what else is a hole? DEBT. The day’s name is THE closest that the collective United States of America comes to brutal self-awareness. Gotta give it props for THAT, anyway. Oh, but I do ramble on. Happy shopping, really.
You're preaching to the choir, buddy. Supergod #5. Writer: Warren Ellis, Illustrator: Garrie Gastonay, Inks: Rhoald Marcellius, Color: Digikore Studios
Perceptive readers will note that 2011 isn’t over yet. Hence, our list is NOT “The Best Comics of 2011” – look at the long, odd title I gave the thing. Elsewhere, I have said that our site “stakes its claim as the Golden Globes of the [comic book reviewing] field” by announcing our awards-like stuff first. I’ve also called our timing “a deliberate, calculated Dick Move that I orchestrated just so we’d be first.” While there’s a germ of truth in each of these statements, I’m writing THIS present article to tell you that I’m mostly joking when I say those things.
Bulletproof Coffin #6 - Story & Words: David Hine, Story & Art: Shaky Kane
The Golden Globe Awards, if you don’t know, are movie awards whose televised ceremonies generally are the third-most watched awards shows every year. (The first two are at the link, okay?) This is kind of nuts, because they are decided upon by the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, which has (per that Wikipedia article!) 93 members at present. Their decisions upon winners are available for purchase, it seems, but at least they’ve abandoned their original practice of figuring out winners based upon whether the winner was willing to attend their televised award ceremony. The biggest reason for their ratings success, though, is that they both announce their nominations and then show the winners before the AMPAS does so with the Oscars.
Here at the Comics Vault, our decisions are not for sale – yet! – and we are infinitely more qualified than the HFPA to announce What Is Truth in our art criticism. Why? Because they are all paid for their opinions, as professional jounalists. We, on the other hand, perform our task pro bono. We do it for love!
The Return of Bruce Wayne #6. Writer: Grant Morrison, Penciler: Lee Garbett, Inker: Alejandro Sicat, Colorist: Guy Major, Letterer: Jared K. Fletcher
As for the timing, one may very well ask, “Why now?” Or perhaps, “Are you really saying that your period of review is gonna be from the third Wednesday of November through the second one in November the next year every year? Are you nuts? Is that your deal? You’re nuts?” Well, we arereally saying that, yes. And no I am not crazy, that’s not my deal, not really.
Oh, behave! Knight and Squire #2. Writer: Paul Cornell, Artist: Jimmy Broxton, Colorist: Guy Major
As for “Why now?” The reason is because, why NOT now? We are free, you know. ALL of us, all human beings, in SOME sense are truly free, insofar as where no rules exist, we may make our own. That is what we here at The Comics Vault have done. We reject the idea that we must obey the arbitrarily chosen first day of the Julian and Gregorian Calendars. We are no more bound to start and end at that date than we are to spend it observing The Feast of the Circumcision. We are art critics! Capital-A Art is fearless; it doesn’t bolster rules, it bends rules to its whim. We would be UNFIT to render judgment upon the pieces of this medium were we to aspire to any less.
Oh, just plop down like you own the joint! GOD! From a story in DC Universe Legacies #8. Writer: Len Wein, Artist: Frank Quitely, Colorist: Peter Doherty, Letterer: Rob Leigh
Now, to be frank, none of the writers here knew in MAY of this year – let alone November of 2010 – that we would be blogging about comics right now. So, yeah, there’s a good likelihood that we missed some awesome thing that shipped in December of 2010 – in fact, this whole article is illustrated with some of my favorite stuff from the last two months of 2010. Well, next year, we’ll do better. And if we want to, we will reject the sun itself and start observing 26-hour days. Because we are free, and that, my friend, is how we roll. Thank you for visiting us here, and as Tony Stark would say, keep coming back!
Matt Fraction’s Mighty Thor run has been a hard nut to crack thus far. Fraction has definitely introduced some huge ideas into this book. Introducing a new Herald for Galactus and removing the Silver Surfer of the Power Cosmic , also killing off Thor, and finally creating a New God of Thunder Tanarus.
The beginning of issue 8 starts off with Asgard being rebuilt yet again. Heimdell welcomes the All Mother’s to New Asgard and brings them up to speed as to why all the other citizens from the Nine Realms are in Asgard as well. Fraction then introduces us too Tanarus who is the new God of Thunder. Fraction goes so far as to explain to the reader that the people of Asgard know Tanarus as the one and only God of Thunder. It was Tanarus who founded the Avengers , and Tanarus who befell the Serpent . Fraction introduces these story threads but never explains them out right , creating alot of confusion for the reader.
Enter Loki who is the only person that recognizes something is off . I like the idea of Loki becoming more of a sympathetic character in his own book Journey into Mystery . While I’ve read and love the hell out of that book , other readers who haven’t been following it may look at Loki as merely a whining kid. Loki immediately seeks an audience with the three witches and upon seeing him they hit him with a bolt of lighting that causes him to remember his brother’s Name Thor. We get a small glimpse into the life of Norrin Radd that is quite funny and shows us Fraction’s planning on having the former Silver Surfer in this book for the foreseeable future.
Pasqual Ferry’s art is a welcome addition back to the series and creates a nice sense of whimsy to each page. His art is clean and fluid and he manages to create a great sense of scale in Asgard while taking the time to let characters breathe in quieter moments. Ferry’s art is reminiscent of Don Bluth animation. I especially like the way he draws giant Beasts , monsters , and after this issue trolls.The last page of art to this issue was gorgeous.
This issue starts slow but with the reveal towards the end of the issue as to who Tanarus really is as well as the last two pages that shed some light as to where Thor has ended up after his apparent death. I’m definitely very excited to see where the next issue goes. Fraction continues to build on The God of Thunders mythos and while this issue lacks some clear answers as to whats happening , the art and end of the book make up for the short comings at the beginning of the book. I’m curious to see how Fraction approaches telling this story and hope that he doesn’t play things so close to the chest next issue.
(WARNING: There are all kinds of swears in here, up, down, and sideways. In today’s America, a typical 10-year-old has heard the “F” word about a thousand jillion times. BUT! If you object to such stuff, YOU WON’T LIKE IT HERE! Perhaps you would enjoy BleedingCool.Com better? SCRAM, WUSS!)
Some of the authors thought this issue was good, and that Marcos Martin might be a good artist.
The mighty Comics Vault bullpen of hotheads, sociopaths, schizos, holograms, and women from France got together to throw down about the past 13-ish months’ worth of excellence in the field of comic book art. We were on the scene to record that momentous conversation, and will again be on the scene in five weeks to testify at the ensuing litigation! Let’s jump in at the beginning, SHALL WE?
Here are the categories that the Comic Vault staff judged: Best letterer
Best colorer
Best one-shot
Best floppy re-issue (Walking Dead Weekly, DC Presents, etc)
Best canceled series
Best series that we’re not sure if it’s canceled or what
Best Limited Series
Best Original Graphic Novel
Best ongoing series that doesn’t come out real often (RASL, Infinite Vacation – basically, any Indie, pretty much.)
Best single page
Best sequence of panels
Best-written single issue
Best-drawn single issue
Best anthology series
Best story arc
Best publishing company
Best writer/artist
Best writer
Best artist
Best overall single issue
Best series
Best comic thing of the year of any sort
With out further ado, let the fairy tale, award show, train wreck begin……
(JOHN paces nervously in Comics Vault Tower, a one-story brownstone mounted high up near the heart of downtown Chicago, on top of the biggest antenna on Sears Tower. It looks like some kinda crazy cubic stone Dennis Miller sitting on top of John Holmes’s skyscraper building antenna from that one time that he co-owned a skyscraper with, oh, let’s say Jean-Paul Sartre.)
JOHN VELOUSIS: (To himself, like a crazy person) Come ON. Being on time means being ten minutes early or something. They’re probably together. Talking about me. Plotting against me. Calling me a “crazy person” in a pejorative way. I hate them so much! Why don’t they like me more?
ROGER RIDDELL III: Where is everybody?
JV: I’m right, here, Riddell.
RR: Where is everybody?
JV: I really do NOT want to start this, dude.
RR: Guys, I’m here!
JV: Roger, come on, we’ve had our dif-
RR: I’M RIGHT HERE! HELLOOOOOOO!
(JV sits and seethes. He and Roger pointedly don’t make eye contact. The 7:30 start-time comes and passes without any word from anyone else. 7:40 does this as well. Roger begins loudly playing that knife thing Lance Henriksen does in [amazon_link id=”B00012FXAE” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Aliens[/amazon_link]. At 7:45, John abruptly grabs the CB Radio microphone and yells into the speak-into-here part of it)
JV: This is just like Sunday all over again, fuck you all I hate you roundtable is canceled I hate you!
(NICK SANDILANDS enters through the hatch in the floor, carrying a box the size and shape of the one that had Gwyneth’s head in it in [amazon_link id=”B00464AVXW” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Seven[/amazon_link].)
NICK: Hey guys, I made food! Oh. Are you two, uhhhhh… I made food.
RR: Where is everybody?
JV: I will stab y-
(MIKE DEVIVO crashes through the window, swinging on a rope from something somehow.)
MIKE: YEAHHHHHHH!!!!!
JV: Why would you do that!? AGAIN!? The fricking oxygiiihhhggsha
(72 HOURS LATER)
RR: [amazon_link id=”B0024FAR5M” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Sons of Anarchy[/amazon_link] is fantastic. (JV Glares. Mike uses a pencil to itch under some of his bandage wrappings. Nick looks nervous.)
RR: As opposed to the snoozefest that the [amazon_link id=”B0049P1VHS” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Walking Dead[/amazon_link] has been.
JV: Never actually seen Sons of Anarchy, got S1 D1 in my Netflix kway-way.
RR: It’s addictive, Johnny.
JV: So’s meth. (long pause) I hear.
RR: First season starts out a little slow just because there’s a lot of exposition in the first couple of episodes, but it stays pretty consistently paced once it gets going.
MEGHAN WHITE: I’m here!
NICK: (Jumping) AAIEAHH!!!
MEG: Most of this stuff I just don’t really feel that strongly about, sooooo yeah.
(MATT SARDO taps on the window from the outside. He’s standing on the ledge.)
MATT: (Faintly, though he’s shouting.) I’m going to stay out here so Mike can’t destroy my oxygen again.
NICK: … Wh… ?
MEG: I flew here from France.
(John and Roger stare at each other in confusion. Roger mouths the words “Kill you.”)
MIKE: I’ll turn Ryan on! (He flips a switch on the Ryan device. A hologram of RYAN W DUELFER appears.)
RYAN: I’m making La-SAG-na! Oh wow, Meg’s here!
MATT: You have to start now! I’m your boss!
JV: BEST LETTERER!
(Long pause)
JV: I have no nominee.
RR: I DO.
MIKE: Neither do I. Come with it, Rog.
RR: ME!
JV: (Doing his totally sweet Asgard voice.) ROGER I COMMAND THEE TO SPEAKETH.
RR: I rewrite all the dialogue in my books. That’s why they all have great reviews.
NICK: If you notice the lettering you are a better man than I.
MATT: If I don’t notice your letters you’re doing a great job.
JV: Nobody has a letterer? Fuck em.
NICK: Aheh, I was wondering why Jason Aaron, Rick Remender, Fraction, and Slott all sounded the same!
RR: JOE CARAMAGNA IS BEST LETTERER
JV: Roger wins. FOR LATEST ANSWER.
RR: At least I had an answer.
JV: Okay, I’ll say Chris Eliopolous, just because Joe Caramagna is in the Vietcong. BEAT YA TWICE OVER!
RR: (Under his breath) I’ll beat you twice. Period.
Oh, big deal, so Dave Stewart used a lot of reds.
JV: BEST COLORER!
(Nobody says anything.)
JV: COLORER, BEST!
JV: Dave Stewart. His work in [amazon_link id=”1595828273″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Hellboy: The Fury[/amazon_link] took my breath away. And I hate my breath.
RR: Edgar Delgado.
MIKE: Gabe Eltaeb and Randy Mayor Green Lantern. Anybody who has to put that many different colors in a book and not have it look cluttered wins.
NICK: Colorer, meh. I couldn’t even name one
RR: ME – SECOND GRADE
JV: You don’t have to yell, we’re all right here in the same room. Except for Matt. And Ryan, kind of.
RYAN: Bettie Breitweiser, from [amazon_link id=”0785151230″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Captain America and Bucky[/amazon_link]. (Ryan then makes this “grrrrrr” rolling-tongue sound that the others pretend not to hear.)
The Duncan Fegredo Art doesn't totally suck either.
NICK: Can we be real for a second, does anyone really think anybody cares about Colorer, Letterer, Inker, etc?
JV: I cannot be real for a second. You completely miss the point of this exercise, and I don’t like your coat.
NICK: Shmobviously.
JV: BEST ONE-SHOT! GO!
NICK: Okay, okay, “pretend-real” then.
RYAN: [amazon_link id=”B0060GAOA4″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Fear itself 7.1[/amazon_link]. Does that… count as a one-shot?
JV: Sure, why not? Do what thou wilt, that shall be the whole of the law.
JV: Wait, no way is Spencer Marvel exclusive, ’cause he’s still doing Morning Glories. And Infinite Vacation, though the next issue probably won’t come out until his contract expires.
NICK: Creator owned!
JV: Mmmmmm. OH, also my Jimmy Olsen vote – uh, are these votes? – is tied with the [amazon_link id=”B0048GXMIE” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Hellboy/Beasts of Burden[/amazon_link] one-shot, which was quite awesome too.
RR: Oh shit…Did I read any one-shots this year? I know I did, but I don’t remember them.
MIKE: I did – Cyclops, and it was god-awful. It kept me away from every other one-shot after it that came out.
RR: Where Robbie Robertson’s kid beat up the Hobgoblin.
NICK: Bing-anigans
RR: And Norah Winters looked even dumber.
NICK: Ask Jeeves-anigans
RR: JEEVES IS DEAD
JV: Well, that’s what Nietzsche says.
NICK: Speaking of Jeeves, does anyone else think Alfred is a Hologram in the New 52?
RYAN: Are you being catty at me?
NICK: Or- no, I… or a robot? Alfred?
MIKE: Nope. (He pulls out a Bat-a-rang-looking thing and readies to toss it, probably at somebody’s face, but John wrestles him to the ground.)
NICK: Or Ultron?
RR: Alfred is Marvel Movieverse Jarvis. Bruce Wayne stole him while traveling through time.
NICK: Bwah!
RR: On the same trip where he bedded Mary Jane on the night of the Spider Wedding.
JV: BEST FLOPPY RE-ISSUE
MIKE: I liked DC’s reissues of classic 90’s and 80’s stories
JV: I yam caught between [amazon_link id=”0785148639″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Casanova: Gula[/amazon_link] or [amazon_link id=”B0055J9STK” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Batman: Irresistible[/amazon_link].
NICK: Oooh I forgot about those Mike! Screw Walking Dead Weekly, I change my answer!
JV: Any of you read the latter? It got no love at all anywhere, super-awesome Tony Harris art with a Tom Peyer script that somehow makes Batman hilarious while still being an utter badass.
Batman: Irresistible - letters by Kurt Hathaway, colors by JD Mettler.
MATT: Who buys re-issues?
JV: People who skipped a decade when good work was being published. And who like standing INSIDE buildings. Aren’t you cold?
MEG: [amazon_link id=”1607060760″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Walking Dead Weekly[/amazon_link], I guess. In France, the tables have machines that hold comics and turn the pages for you.
RR: Does the trade of [amazon_link id=”1592911315″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Neonomicon[/amazon_link] count as a reissue?
JV: NO.
MIKE: That is a firm response to that.
JV: That’s why I put the word “Floppy” in the category title.
RR: It’s been like a year since that series ended, so it can’t be best graphic novel. Although, it was pretty good, what with all the Chthulu rape scenes and whatnot.
JV: There is NO category for best Graphic Novel Re-issue of Stuff Previously Collected In Periodical Form. Deal with it!
RR: I don’t read any other reissues. I only buy first prints of back issues, or I’ll pick up trades if that’s too expensive.
JV: Then poo on your own hand like that guy did in the “[amazon_link id=”B00000FBH2″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]OZ[/amazon_link]” TV show.
RR: NO.
JV: (After pondering) Okay, I’ll respect your wish re: poo. Mike, do you have any specific DC Presents thing?
MIKE: I enjoyed the hell out of [amazon_link id=”B000WOVVC0″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Superman: Secret Identity[/amazon_link].
MIKE: I really enjoyed Red Robin. I liked what they did with Tim.
NICK: Tim was really headed down the paranoid insane Batman path.
MIKE: Which I enjoyed.
NICK: The Ra’s al Ghul plot was great.
MIKE: I liked that they were setting up Ras as his ultimate villain. No one is showing my pick Nova any love, huh?
JV: WE HATE NOVA HE IS STINKY AND LOOKS LIKE [a] FART [would look if one could see farts].
RR: o.O
MATT: I miss Nova. And [amazon_link id=”0785138196″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Immortal Iron Fist[/amazon_link] [which was canceled mid-2009] and [amazon_link id=”0785133380″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Guardians of the Galaxy[/amazon_link] [which ended in mid-2010, but I figured I’d bring them up just to be a pain in the balls for whoever is transcribing this shit]!
NICK: Never got a chance to check out Nova. Heard he is going to be involved [in some comics story-line in some way] in 2012 though. Unless I made that up.
RR: I never got a chance to check out Nova, either. Didn’t they kill him in [amazon_link id=”0785146008″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Secret Avengers[/amazon_link]?
NICK: Yeah he dead…
JV: No, he just kinda left Secret Avengers. Like Brubaker did. And every single plot that Brubaker had planned.
RR: He was a member until they went to Mars and he put [the knock-off Serpent Crown] on.
MIKE: Yep.
JV: He didn’t die in Secret Avengers, I mean
MIKE: He IS dead at this point.
JV: Right, okay.
MIKE: Or at least trapped in the cosmic cube with Thanos and Starlord.
RR: I was enjoying that book. I had to put no thought into it at all. And then it stopped mid-storyline and Image claims it’s just delayed. For the past year.
JV: The Baron Von Shock thing is real? Was he the guy from [amazon_link id=”0785125167″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Avengers: The Initiative[/amazon_link]?
RR: No. Baron Von Shock was an Image book written by Rob Zombie. It was weird and campy and terrible, but I enjoyed it because of that.
MATT: Did [amazon_link id=”B005HKL89K” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Ultimate Wolverine Vs. Hulk[/amazon_link] finish?
JV: My answer is T.H.U.N.D.E.R. Agents. I think. [Editorial note, 2 days later, John saw in an ad in some DC publication that the annoying-to-type T.H.U.N.D.E.R. Agents was going to be wrapped up as a six-issue mini-series.] Batman, Incorporated WOULD be my answer, but [some DC insider that John thinks he’s BFFs with or something] says it ain’t canceled. BUT [the guy I know] may be fooling himself. I think DC is gonna totally fuck Grant Morrison and [B.I.’s talented but obscure artist] [amazon_link id=”1607064774″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Chris Burnham[/amazon_link]. In the bad way.
NICK: (Massively sarcastic) Even with the sweet new Jim Lee Darkseid redesign? Supposedly Batman, Incorporated is going to be renamed as Batman Leviathan and finished early 2012.
JV: NO WAY will it be finished early 2012. As of about a month ago, DC didn’t even have any scripts.
RR: But if that happens, Burnham can just write Captain America, Incorporated.
NICK: He has Body Armor!!!!
JV: PWAFFF
NICK: Captain America, Inc. Shh, you’re gonna give Marvel ideas!
RR: It’s not like they didn’t have a bunch of dudes trying to get that shield.
NICK: Will Captain America have Body Armor when Jim Lee redesigns him…
RYAN: [amazon_link id=”B005H0FO1I” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]X-Men: Schism[/amazon_link]. Me too!
MATT: Third vote here for [amazon_link id=”B005BTA500″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]X-Men Schism[/amazon_link], that or [amazon_link id=”0785151958″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Ultimate Captain America[/amazon_link].
MIKE: [amazon_link id=”0785149023″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Thanos Imperative[/amazon_link]. That book was written and drawn in Amazing Sauce.
NICK: Knight of Vengeance! The only good Flashpoint series. Azzarello and Risso! Martha Wayne as the Joker! Whaaaaaa!!!!!
RR: Schism or [amazon_link id=”0785158049″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Fear Itself: Spider-Man[/amazon_link]. That was the only Fear Itself book that I enjoyed.
JV: [amazon_link id=”0785151559″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Incognito: Bad Influences[/amazon_link] or [amazon_link id=”B005PHU0TE” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]BPRD: Monsters[/amazon_link] or [amazon_link id=”1595828257″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Axe Cop: Bad Guy Earth[/amazon_link]. I like things with colons.
NICK: Didn’t read any of those, haven’t ever been a big X fan, but you know I am interested in reading even more so now that you guys like it so much.
JV: (In a way hot-assed Scottish accent) I dinnae read any of your answers either.
RR: [amazon_link id=”1592911099″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Crossed 3D[/amazon_link] was an interesting one-shot. I like turtles.
JV: Actually, now that [Martha Joker]’s been mentioned, I DID read issue 1 of [Knight of Vengeance], but not the rest. We all like turtles, I think it goes without saying.
RR: And I take back what I said about Fear Itself: Spider-Man being the only Fear Itself book I enjoyed. [amazon_link id=”0785158073″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Fear Itself: Deadpool [/amazon_link]was fun.
JV: Fear Itself: Deadpool TOTALLY rocked! Give it! (He and Roger high-five, then Roger uses the other hand to sucker-punch JV in the jaw.] AOOUW YOU COCK!
NICK: I didn’t read any of the Fear Itself tie-ins besides .1 and .2.
JV: BEST ORIGINAL GRAPHIC BONG AND / OR NOVEL
(Mike looks dead.)
JV: Is Mike dead? FUCK!
RR: The GN I’ve been thinking about writing is the best one.
MIKE: (Lying) Nope.
RR: HE’S GOT MACARONI COMA. (Earlier, Mike had eaten a LOT of macaroni and cheese. Like, a bowl the size of the box that Gwyneth Paltrow’s head was in at the end of [amazon_link id=”B001BPQT8A” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Seven[/amazon_link]. Which is really too much mac & cheese to eat in one sitting.)
NICK: Mac and Cheese coma shmobvs.
JV: DAMMIT!
NICK: Ahhhh!!!
MIKE: This is true.
RR: MACOMARONI.
NICK: Great minds Roger! (Roger punches Nick in the ear.) YACCH! WHAT THE FUCK!
MIKE: Shameless plug for [amazon_link id=”B0032Z4MJK” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Velveeta shells and cheese[/amazon_link]. (Stares at feet.) I made three boxes.
JV: I wanted to cook & eat your dead tattoo, Mike. (Long Pause) Is that weird?
NICK: Graphic Novel, if I don’t get laughed off the panel for it being too girly, [amazon_link id=”1401232914″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]New York Five[/amazon_link].
RYAN: My god, you are such a pussy.
JV: BEST ORIGINAL GRAPHIC NOVEL!!!!!!!
MIKE: I had a tough time with this one
RR: Does [amazon_link id=”1592911242″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Crossed 3D[/amazon_link] count?
JV: How would we know?
RR: It was a graphic novel.
MEG: Does [amazon_link id=”1934964379″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Stumptown[/amazon_link] count?
JV: NO! Listen, BEST. ORIGINAL. Right there, if it’s a collected series that was previously A SERIES, THEN IT’S NOT ORIGINAL!
MEG: Uh-HUH. (Steadily gives JV the stink-eye.)
MIKE: I want to just say Hickman’s [amazon_link id=”0785144226″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]S.H.I.E.L.D.[/amazon_link] because it reads much better that way.
JV: (Shouting… really starting to lose it.) I WANT PEOPLE TO OBSERVE PARAMETERS BUT I GUESS NOBODY [is] GONNA GET [the precise] THING [they’re seeking in this instance, you lousy] FUCKERS!
(Mike and Nick are laughing hard enough that their sides are clearly hurting. Matt has put his ear to the window to hear the rest better. It seems stuck.)
(2 HOURS LATER)
JV: [amazon_link id=”1934964441″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Petrograd[/amazon_link] is my answer. (He’s holding a blood-soaked t-shirt to his neck.)
JV: That wasn’t original, it was stolen from the Samuel Beckett play of the same name.
RR: I couldn’t believe DC released a cheap cash-in graphic novel adaptation of [amazon_link id=”1401219268″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Watchmen[/amazon_link].
JV: BEST ONGOING SERIES THAT DOESN”T COME OUT REAL OFTEN! (BASICALLY MOST ANY INDIE BOOK)
MEG: [amazon_link id=”0785152512″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Scarlet[/amazon_link].
MATT: Stuff of Legend is my favorite indie book! (He’s still in the same spot he was 2 hours ago, his ear is DEFINITELY stuck to the window.)
NICK: Scarlet by Bendis and Maleev, with Infinite Vacation a close, close, close second.
MIKE: Nick Spencer is on all kinds of crazy for [Infinite Vacation].
RR: [amazon_link id=”0785151036″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Amazing Spider-Man[/amazon_link], because it only comes out twice a month and that is not enough.
NICK: The art in that is crazy as well Mike.
MIKE: I agree, it’s pretty amazing.
JV: I really do enjoy Infinite Vacation, gotta say, but Godland is off-the-hook awesome.
MIKE: Water colors be damned.
JV: Is THAT how colors grow? (Long pause) You water them? (Long pause) Water colors? (Long pause) Hello?
MIKE: [amazon_link id=”B001QIGZX6″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]The Cape[/amazon_link] should get a mention as well. It has nothing to do with that cancelled NBC show.
NICK: Which was the worst thing ever, how did I watch 10 episodes of that?
MIKE: Has anyone checked out Cape? The comic has nothing to do with the [amazon_link id=”B004XM38CS” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]show[/amazon_link].
JV: Nossir. Uh, I wanna mention [amazon_link id=”B005OHT7DK” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Powers[/amazon_link] also. And RASL.
NICK: Powers… also soon to be a crappy TV show… Negative, but I love Joe Hill.
JV: I love Joe Mama. I really hope POWERS isn’t horrible.
NICK: Locke & Key has been a pretty great read. Sad that it’s going to be wrapped up soon.
JV: THAT series does intrigue me, gotta check it out.
NICK: I definitely highly recommend Locke & Key.
JV: None of us reads ANYTHING. We’re gonna look like complete assholes.
RR: Powers is going to be on FX, right?
NICK: Yeah, Powers on FX. What makes us great is that we all read different things! So when we come together we are like Voltron! (John is confused, he never read the thing with Voltron in it.)
JV: I get the impression more that when we come together we’re like bukkake.
JV: BEST SINGLE PAGE OR SPLASH PAGE OR 2-PAGE SPLASH, I’M FEELING LIBERAL NOW
RR: I used to think any original series FX aired would be fantastic, and then they aired that [amazon_link id=”B0065FFMR0″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]American Horror Story[/amazon_link] shit.
NICK: Matt’s nomination of Carl’s hole in his head was probably my favorite moment of The Walking Dead ever. To be honest, I had been pretty bored and contemplating dropping Walking Dead until that point.
RR: ASM 655 had the best splash page.
MIKE: Yeah that was brutal.
RR: With the cathedral. What’s the Walking Dead book like compared to the show?
MIKE: Different, which is a good thing.
RR: The show is pretty boring, and I’ve held off on getting into the book because of that.
MIKE: It keeps it interesting.
NICK: Definitely.
JV: I shall go with the Uncle Ben page [from ASM 655], but only the version with the captions removed. Or the cathedral. Or the Escher thing from [amazon_link id=”B005XZEBP2″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Secret Avengers 18[/amazon_link].
MIKE: I think people are giving the show too much flack.
JV: Rog, the Walking Dead book is 10,000,000% better. In every way that the show is cliched and predictable, the book is clever and inventive and original. They’re like opposites.
MIKE: Yep.
NICK: I haven’t watched the last two episodes, but the first two of this season were meh.
RR: They are terrible at doing flashbacks on the show.
RR: Sequence? The Shang-Chi fight from Secret Avengers 18.
NICK: Shang Chi!
David Aja with Raul Allen. Warren Ellis wrote it. I'll be your thug any time, Commander!
JV: That two-page six-panel fight thing was a total salute to Winsor McKay, but with bone-crunching violence added. But, like, the figure posing and the line-work was straight out of [amazon_link id=”1449576974″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Little Nemo in Slumberland[/amazon_link].
RYAN: From[amazon_link id=”0785156623″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ] Fear Itself #7[/amazon_link], Steve Rogers – Captain America – receives Mjolnir!
MATT: Walking Dead #83 again, when Rick hacks off his girlfriend’s hand to save him and Carl.
NICK: The death of Johnny Storm.
MATT: Yeah, the [amazon_link id=”0785151435″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Fantastic Four[/amazon_link] where the Human Torch dies is pretty good.
JV: I am going to go with the series of splash pages beginning Fables [amazon_link id=”B0056H0CTQ” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]#106[/amazon_link], first 9 pages. Amazing shit, as momentous and enormous as the dire threat that itself was jarringly and amazingly squelched by the sacrifice of Bigby’s father. Man, amazing issue.
EXACTLY. Mark Buckingham pencils, Steve Leialoha inks, Lee Loughridge colors, Todd Klein letters, Bill Willingham writes.
MIKE: Honestly best sequence for me was Green Lantern #67. Sinestro protecting Hal and then getting a GL ring out of nowhere was pretty cool.
NICK: GL 67 was pretty great, very unexpected.
MIKE: Yes. It was definitely a fitting end to that arc.
NICK: Excited to see how this resolves itself. I don’t buy the ending to GL#3.
MIKE: Me neither.
JV: BEST SURPRISE ENDING OR TWIST, I HAVE NO ANSWER BTW
RYAN: The ending of [amazon_link id=”B0064GH5KW” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Magneto: Not A Hero #1[/amazon_link] – The return of Joseph =]!!
JV: Yeah, uh, I read that and have no idea, who the eff is Joseph? I missed that era of super-history. Also, what the hell did you just do with your head?
RYAN: Joseph was a clone of Magneto created in the mid-90’s. Everyone believed him to be Magneto, amnesic from the fall of Avalon and Xavier wiping his mind clean. He sacrificed himself during “the [amazon_link id=”B002Q6ULKK” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Magneto War[/amazon_link]” years later. And I smiled broadly, sideways.
MIKE: Batman #1 with Joker getting his face ripped off and nailed to the wall was a “Holyshit!” moment if I ever saw one.
NICK: Joker face-off is pretty good.
FAVORITE CHARACTER
RR: Spider-Man. Although, I feel more like a Wolverine guy these days.
NICK: Batman.
JV: Character. Huh. I dunno. I’m gonna go with the tilde. No, wait, I’m going to go with a dark horse here – Finesse from Avengers Academy. Her actions and words rock nearly every issue, from her Sherlock Holmes act in the “point one” issue to her heroism in the Fear Itself storyline conclusion. Also, her haircut is really the right one for her head, I think.
(Nobody says anything for a really long time.)
RYAN: James Buchanan Barnes.
(Nobody says anything for a REALLY long time.)
JV: BEST-WRITTEN SINGLE ISSUE
MIKE: Nick Spencer’s creation of the first issue of [amazon_link id=”B004IAF1A2″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Infinite Vacation[/amazon_link]. Seriously huge ideas happening in that book.
JV: Is that the only comic you read last year? (JV’s deliberately standing out of Matt’s view because he knows Matt can’t move his head.)
NICK: Best Single Issue [amazon_link id=”B0054YSXRY” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Amazing Spider-Man #655[/amazon_link].
RR: ASM 655.
JV: You’re all not wrong here. But I say it’s issue [amazon_link id=”B005BSX0RQ” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]#2 of Hellboy: The Fury[/amazon_link]. It’s unusual for the MIDDLE issue of a miniseries to be the best one, but THAT one was a game-changer. Mike Mignola pulled out all the stops, with callbacks a-plenty, amazing and dramatic mood changes, and a stunning narrative device that worked to perfection: Hellboy is fighting the Dragon, who is telling Hellboy of its invincibility – the Dragon’s INEVITABILITY.
JV: Suddenly, the word balloons become caption boxes, and the result blows away these words’ poor power to add to or detract from its impact.
(Everybody pretty much ignores JV and talks while he’s rambling – muttering, really.)
NICK: But haven’t you seen [amazon_link id=”B00005V1WW” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]The One[/amazon_link], Mike? Not the One Mike, but The One, Mike. Similar idea…
MIKE: The terrible Jet Li film?
NICK: Turrible, turrible.
JV: BEST-DRAWN SINGLE ISSUE
RR: Amazing Spider-Man #655
JV: Tie between ASM 655 & Secret Avengers 18
NICK: Secret Avengers 18! Or ASM 655! BASTARDS! At least we all know great art.
JV: Mike luvs [amazon_link id=”B005LJITS0″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Green Lantern[/amazon_link]. Hey Mike, marry Green Lantern.
MIKE: Seriously, Mahnke delivered in that book.
JV: More like WANKY!
MIKE: It felt huge in scope. I enjoy a well-drawn book. Which GL #67 is.
JV: Seriously, if we go to C3P2D2, let’s start a fist fight.
RR: If CBR decides to pay me to cover C2E2 again, I might be torn
JV: New asshole for you will be torn by me in fist fight.
JV: BEST ANTHOLOGY SERIES
JV: [amazon_link id=”B005NJ0K2G” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Dark Horse Presents[/amazon_link]. Very welcome in its return to the world.
MIKE: I don’t have a horse in the anthology race.
NICK: I’m with Mike, no answers.
JV: Okay, fuck dat. I just, uh, wanted to give DHP some love without actually, y’know, reviewing it.
RR: If we go to C2E2, I call dibs on cosplaying as Kraven.
RR: NOBODY cosplays as Kraven.
JV: MOST PROMISING NEW SERIES (“NEW 52” DIVISION)
MIKE: Animal Man. Really, a tie between that and Swamp Thing. Just because they are both contributing to a larger story.
JV: Is there a list of these somewhere?
NICK: Here’s a link. (Hands JV a sausage link.) I’ll also say Animal Man.
RR: I don’t read DC except for Batman graphic novels. I have too much on my pull list to add the Batman books.
MIKE: I can’t wait ’til they release it in trade. I just want to mow through it again.
NICK: [amazon_link id=”B00559VS6G” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Uncanny X-Force[/amazon_link], the [amazon_link id=”B005EBZNDY” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Dark Angel Saga[/amazon_link] so far!
RYAN: Ditto on the [amazon_link id=”B0050VGIMS” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Dark Angel Saga[/amazon_link]!
Esad Ribic's covers for Uncanny X-Force are all neat-o keen-o.
RR: I need to re-read [amazon_link id=”B005JF4GAG” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Dark Angel Saga[/amazon_link].
MIKE: So far that’s been amazing too.
RR: I keep getting lost during the month-long breaks.
NICK: I’m excited to see it wrapped up.
MIKE: Me too, it’s got one issue left.
RR: I hate that it’s wrapping after they already announced the new X-teams, now everyone knows who dies, if it wasn’t already obvious.
NICK: Yeah, I was reading a Rick Remender interview today, it talks about Psylocke and Wolverine being on opposite sides, and having it explained in #19.
JV: BEST PUBLISHING COMPANY
RR: Marvel
JV: Who gives a fuck? Why did I make THIS a category?
MATT: I like DC for their rolling back of prices.
MIKE: DC for actually pulling of the New 52 successfully, and the price rollback.
RYAN: DC (price cuts!)
MEG: DC wins this year.
NICK: DC – Drawing the line at $2.99! Next year, whoever drops $1 off their digital comics from store cost.
JV: BEST COMBO WRITER / ARTIST
MEG: J.H Williams III.
MIKE: J.H Williams III. Batwoman is insanely good. Like, I’m impressed he’s been able to keep the quality of the art up.
NICK: J.H. Williams III is a solid choice.
Art? J.H. Williams III - colors by Dave motherfuckin' Stewart!
JV: Eric Powell ([amazon_link id=”1595823468″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]The Goon[/amazon_link]) or Jeff Smith ([amazon_link id=”1888963204″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]RASL[/amazon_link])
RR: I like Slott, Remender and Aaron. Can’t decide for sure. Slott’s ASM has been phenomenal.
JV: HUH? LISTEN TO THE FUCKING CATEGORY!
MIKE: This is for a writer who is also the artist.
NICK: Jagass.
RR: Oh.
JV: I GONNA SUE YOU!
RR: I’m not paying attention…[amazon_link id=”B003L77GK6″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Sons of Anarchy[/amazon_link] is about to come on [my face.]
MIKE: (Who has been huffing furniture polish for the last 5 pages, BTW) Which logically means make you agree with me and say [amazon_link id=”B005I63N5A” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Batwoman[/amazon_link].
NICK: I like that Batwoman is going to be one of the Hardcover releases.
MIKE: Me too. Uh, anybody want some furniture polish? I forgot I was hogging.
JV: BEST WRITER
RR: SLOTT!
MEG: Scott Snyder.
NICK: Rick Remender!
RYAN: Jason Aaron (X-Men Schism, Wolverine and the X-Men, [amazon_link id=”0785147853″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Wolverine[/amazon_link].)
MATT: Jason Aaron.
MIKE: Scott Snyder.
RR: OR REMENDER OR AARON!
MIKE: Remender is a close second.
NICK: [amazon_link id=”0785158111″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Venom[/amazon_link], [amazon_link id=”B005TLUJXS” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]X-Force[/amazon_link], [and now that Mike is sharing his polish, I’ll pretend Remender’s also written] [amazon_link id=”0785152555″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Secret Avengers[/amazon_link].
JV: JEFF PARKER! And / or the Mignola-Arcudi team.
NICK: Slott would be my close second, Bendis would be third.
MIKE: Batman, Detective, American Vampire, Swamp Thing. Snyder has been a beast this year.
JV: Nick Spencer would run away with it if not for his Marvel crap.
RR: Slott has done the best ASM since Michelinie.
NICK: Fraction would be here, if he didn’t unleash a stinkbomb called [amazon_link id=”B0060GWOGG” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Fear Itself[/amazon_link].
JV: Right.
NICK: Snyder has been awesome.
MIKE: Agreed. I agree with my own vote.
NICK: And higher. [??]
RR: Bendis gets on my nerves a lot.
NICK: He is too talky, but he does great dialogue.
JV: I like BMB.
RR: [amazon_link id=”B0063U5RS6″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]New Avengers 18[/amazon_link] didn’t need an entire issue of the same character set-ups over and over and over.
JV: Yeah, he DOES waste a lot of time.
MIKE: [amazon_link id=”0785148728″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]New Avengers[/amazon_link] has become Real World: Avengers Mansion.
NICK: [amazon_link id=”0785151699″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Moon Knight[/amazon_link] is a book everyone should be reading!
JV: BEST ARTIST
RR: Marcos Martin.
MEG: Shit, this could go to Jock, Francavilla, Nicola Scott for existing, JFC I can’t decide!
MIKE: Artist would be Travel Foreman right now.
JV: It would be if Marcos Martin died right now. Travel the fuck outta here with that damn shit!
Same art team as the Cathedral, with letters by VC's Joe Caramagna. But art by THE BEST ARTIST OF 2011, from THE BEST COMIC OF 2011, probably.
MIKE: Or, I love [amazon_link id=”B005XFYPBW” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Thunderbolts[/amazon_link] when Kev Walker’s on it.
NICK: Cliff Chiang is the best artist right now.
NICK: Shame he isn’t working on more stuff.
MIKE: He gets an honorable mention. And hey, Travel Foreman does some pretty cool stuff.
RR: I’m starting to dig Humberto Ramos, although some of his art is still way too anime-ish for me to dig on a 616 (the “main” shared Marvel Universe) book.
NICK: Yeah, I dig Ramos too. His Spider-Island stuff was good.
RR: Yeah. (Suddenly punches Nick in the kidney.) He’s developed a nice balance between that anime style and more cartoonish realism.
MIKE: It’s still funny and odd in all the right ways.
JV: Likewise, Vertigo and Wildstorm are DC Comics.
MIKE: CHEW, guys? [Here, the transcriber has deleted Mike’s Ben Stein shtick from some [amazon_link id=”B000BNX4MC” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]shit[/amazon_link] John Hughes movie.]
MIKE: I want that to be a showtime series, with John Goodman as Savoy.
NICK: I only read it by trade, but it is a great read. It’s one of those books that I tell my wife to read, and she usually hates everything I suggest comic-wise, and she read the first trade and was like, “When can I read the next trade?” It passes the wife test!
MIKE: Cool.
JV: Invincible or Atomic Robo or Mignolaverse stuff ([amazon_link id=”1595827579″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Hellboy[/amazon_link] and [amazon_link id=”1595827560″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]BPRD[/amazon_link] and [amazon_link id=”1595829253″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Abe Sapien[/amazon_link] miniseries.)
JV: [amazon_link id=”0785155783″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]HULK[/amazon_link]. Or [amazon_link id=”0785152210″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Thunderbolts[/amazon_link]. Jeff Parker has not sucked yet, not even once.
RR: ASM or [amazon_link id=”0785158871″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]X-Force[/amazon_link].
MIKE: I would say [amazon_link id=”0785157980″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Thunderbolts[/amazon_link], but Kev’s art is half of it and he was never consistently there.
RR: [amazon_link id=”0785151389″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Deadpool[/amazon_link] is still fun, though.
NICK: Best Vertigo – [amazon_link id=”1401233333″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]American Vampire[/amazon_link]. Best Icon -[amazon_link id=”0785152512″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ] Scarlet[/amazon_link].
MIKE: Scott Snyder continues to roll on.
JV: BEST COMIC THING OF ANY SORT OF THE YEAR
MIKE: Archie comics putting out a [amazon_link id=”1897376162″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Megaman[/amazon_link] comic book counts for me. Being serious here. I’m a Capcom fanboy.
MATT: I love my new[amazon_link id=”B004ZHDI80″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ] Thor hammer key chain[/amazon_link]! It is really heavy and hurts if I hit you with it.
JV: President Axe Cop’s prayer to God at the end of [amazon_link id=”1595828257″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Bad Guy Earth #3[/amazon_link]. No, wait – I change my vote to Sammy Braddy!
MIKE: Our collective talents being brought together by Matt to form this.
MATT: Thanks! OW!
JV: Mike wins! OKAY NOW LEAVE, A-HOLES!
(No Comics Vault writer was ever seen alive again – OR WERE THEY?)
Last issue saw the return of the Vulturions. If you can remember way back to the ’80s, they were those annoying little bastards that did all of the Vulture’s work for him.
