Home Blog Page 1447

REVIEW: “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” – Still lots of fun, but you’ve seen this movie before

Monkeys Fighting Robots

It’s finally here! The long-awaited continuation of the venerable Star Wars saga, Star Wars: The Force Awakens, lands in theaters tomorrow — is it worth the wait?

Well, kind of …?

[WARNING: While this review is “spoiler-free” in the sense that no major plot details that haven’t previously been revealed via the film’s marketing, trailers, or publicity are revealed here, it will discuss aspects of the film’s plot progression and story structure which, if you have foreknowledge of them, MAY affect your overall enjoyment of the film. If you truly wish to know nothing more than what you’ve seen in the commercials before going in to see the film for yourself, stop here, bookmark the review, and then come back and finish once you’ve seen the film.]

Still here? All right then.

While there’s no denying there’s a thrill in returning to that long time ago and that galaxy far, far away, to hearing that triumphant John Williams fanfare accompanying the sight of the film’s title across a static field of stars, followed by the upward crawl of expository text that has preceded every Star Wars cinematic adventure since 1977, and to once again see lightsabers clash and x-wings and tie fighters chase and dodge one another’s red and green blaster fire, it won’t be long into the film’s running time before longtime fans of the series and savvy movie goers who’ve been on the Star Wars merry-go-round more than once to get more than just a slight sense of déjà vu. Oh, yes, the finer details of the story are different, and while old fan favorite characters return, it’s clear that the film really belongs to its younger stars, meant to carry on the saga to another generation.

But look just a little past the surface details and it’s not hard to see what director J.J. Abrams, who came up with the film’s screen story along with longtime Star Wars scribe Lawrence Kasdan, has done. It’s nothing more, and certainly nothing less, than Abrams’ love letter to George Lucas’ original work nearly 40 years ago, and while that emotional attachment to what came before benefits the film in terms of nostalgic value, it also limits the film’s creativity and impact.

The story of Star Wars: The Force Awakens, set thirty years after the Battle of Endor seen in 1983’s Return of the Jedi, primarily revolves around two new characters: Rey (Daisy Ridley), a scavenger making her living on the remote desert planet of Jakku by salvaging parts from the many crashed Imperial Star Destroyers and Rebel vessels that litter the planet’s surface; and Finn, once a Stormtrooper serving The First Order, which has risen from the ashes of the old Galactic Empire, but now on the run after he finds his conscience won’t allow him to follow the Order’s brutal methods. Their paths cross thanks to Rey coming upon and taking into her care a diminutive droid, BB-8, which claims to be carrying information desperately sought after by the Resistance, led by General Leia Organa (Carrie Fisher), which opposes the First Order’s march across the galaxy.

In charge of the effort to hunt down BB-8 are First Order General Hux (Domhnall Gleeson) and the masked lightsaber wielding warrior Kylo Ren (Adam Driver), who along with their master, Supreme Leader Snoke (Andy Serkis), believe securing the droid’s information and acting upon it before the Resistance can will make them unstoppable. What these would-be conquerers don’t count on is Rey, Finn, and BB-8 getting a little help along the way from some very unlikely sources: the Resistance’s most talented fighter pilot, Poe Dameron (Oscar Isaac); an old-but-still fast piece of junk Corellian freighter, and an older-but-still-charming smuggler named Han Solo (Harrison Ford), with his faithful Wookie co-pilot Chewbacca (Peter Mayhew) still at his side. Together, they’ll discover the threat they and the Resistance face is much larger and deadlier than anyone could have imagined, as Kylo Ren and his master seek to reclaim the power once held by the long-dead Darth Vader and his Emperor over the entire galaxy, and to extinguish all hope of resistance against the Dark Side of the Force.

Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Now first: the positive. Star Wars: The Force Awakens is without a doubt a more enjoyable cinematic experience than any of the three prequel films written and directed by George Lucas and released from 1999 to 2005, mainly due to the much stronger script produced by Abrams, Kasdan, and Michael Arndt (Toy Story 3, Little Miss Sunshine) and Abrams’ more dynamic and contemporary style and vision. It’s also a film that never lets you forget the people who crafted it are fans who know the canon, who could recite entire scenes from the original films verbatim and thus include numerous verbal and visual references to those films throughout their work, knowing fellow fans will appreciate what they’ve done. With a clear emphasis placed on location shooting and practical sets and effects whenever possible, there’s considerable effort here to make the film look, sound, and feel like it belongs in the same Star Wars universe folks remember from the days when Han, Luke, and Leia were young. If you consider yourself a classic Star Wars geek first and foremost, then you’ll find a lot to love here, at least in the visual details.

There’s also plenty to enjoy in terms of the performances delivered here, though some characters shine a bit more than perhaps they are meant to. Despite his role being a supporting one, the most dynamic and charismatic of the film’s younger cast is easily Oscar Isaac. The talented and versatile Isaac, who up to this point in his Hollywood career has had few opportunities to play the dashing hero, proves as he brings to life Poe Dameron that’s he’s more than equal to the task. He, along with his Ex Machina castmate Domhnall Gleeson, each make the most of their screen time, and their respective talents demand meatier roles in the Star Wars sequels to come. As for the newcomers meant to be the leads here, Daisy Ridley and John Boyega, they deliver solid, if unspectacular work. There’s plenty of room for their characters to be developed in the films to come, but for now, they do their best with what they’re given, and it’s enough to have you rooting for them when the time is right.

And what about the old timers? Suffice to say that they slip back into their old roles quite nicely, especially Ford, who brings a new, crusty charm to the older, grayer Captain Solo. Much of the film’s humor (and there’s a surprising amount of it, more so perhaps than any previous Star Wars film) has Solo and Chewbacca at its heart, and rightly so — after all, they were the coolest characters in the original films, were they not? Sorry, Skywalker fans — Luke didn’t even approach “cool” until Jedi.

So if all that’s good, and the movie is fun, then what’s wrong with it? In this case, the film’s strength — it being so deeply rooted in love for the original film and its two sequels — is also its chief limitation, as it can very easily be argued that Star Wars: The Force Awakens is a poorly-disguised remake of A New Hope. The film’s structure and plot progression are virtually identical to Lucas’ original film, right down to how the film’s pace begins to lag in the second act, only to ramp up with climactic dogfights and lightsaber duels dominating the film’s action-heavy third act. Call it an homage to the original, or call it little more than a modernized copy, but there’s simply too much that’s similar for it all to be ignored, and once you recognize those similarities, you know where the movie is going and you can predict certain outcomes, which detracts from any movie experience.

But there’s also arguably another reason why Star Wars: The Force Awakens doesn’t quite reach the greatness that’s expected of it. The simple truth is that back in 1977 Star Wars was a synthesis of a number of different thematic and cinematic elements put together and presented in a way that had never been done before. People walked out of it being completely blown away, because in the truest sense they’d never seen anything like it before, and the film went on to redefine the way sci-fi films and particularly their special effects were created. Will you walk out of Star Wars: The Force Awakens with a similar feeling, that of being completely blown away, as if you’ve never seen anything like what you just sat through before? Even if you haven’t ever seen Star Wars: A New Hope, probably not — in fact, it’s much more likely you’ll have the opposite reaction, that it’s all too familiar.

But depending on what brought you to the theater to see the film in the first place, that may not matter all that much. What will matter most (especially to the folks counting beans at Disney) is that you’ll be left wanting more, and it’s good bet you’ll walk out feeling that a great deal. Therein lies the great hope for the films to come: that Abrams, now done with all the fervent fanboy-fueled honoring of the past that goes on in this first effort, can take the franchise into truly uncharted territory, and thus deliver something transcendent by time his new trilogy is done.

Star Wars: The Force Awakens
Starring Harrison Ford, Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher Adam Driver, Daisy Ridley, John Boyega, Oscar Isaac, Lupita Nyong’o, Andy Serkis, Domhnall Gleeson, Anthony Daniels, Peter Mayhew, and Max Von Sydow. Directed by J.J. Abrams.
Running Time: 135 minutes
Rated PG-13 for sci-fi action violence.

Monkeys Fighting Robots Youtube

Review: ‘Star Wars: The Force Awakens’ – Exceeds Galactic Size Expectations

Monkeys Fighting Robots

For those Star Wars trivia buffs, the first words uttered in Star Wars: The Force Awakens are ” This will begin to set things right.” Never has an opening line been more appropriate because in 126 minutes, Star Wars: The Force Awakens erases the sins of the past prequels and delivers a new hope to the legions of Star Wars fans worldwide. Gone is the terrible CGI effects, stilted scripts, and mediocre performances of the past three films. They have been replaced with practical effects, realistic set designs, a stellar script, incredible musical scores, and excellent performances. J.J. Abrams took on the herculean task of charting a new course for the Star Wars franchise under tremendous corporate pressure from Disney. Four billion dollars worth of pressure to be exact. Abrams has rose to the occasion creating a stunning film. Fans will leave the theater smiling and immediately want to see the movie again (I know that I’m going again with my 8-month pregnant wife on Thursday night).

Part of what made the original trilogy amazing is the audience could sit in their chairs and envision a scenario where what they were watching transpire could actually unfold. All of us can remember at one point or another practicing our “Force” move in front of the automatic doors at the supermarket. Envisioning that we too were becoming Jedi Knights like our father before us (okay maybe it was just me but you get the picture) but that realistic movie magic vanished with the prequels and replaced with computer trickery. As much as we may have tried to justify what we watched in Attack Of The Clones, there was no movie magic. Well, Star Wars: The Force Awakens returns to its realistic roots and creates a world of magic and plausibility. You will be impressed with the character designs on the Planet Jakku (Hey, we could have a planet right now inhabited by alien beings that are interested in scrap metal). The characters that interact with Rey (Daisy Ridley) are not only realistic but bring an authenticity that has been missing from the last three films and the Star Wars universe for quite some time. (Keep an eye our for Simon Pegg’s character.)

tfa3

The set designs by Lee Sandales are so impressive, every new part of the galaxy; Jakku, Star Killer Base ( The home of the First Order), and even the resistance base where done in such a meticulous manner that it brought the universe to life. My favorite set was Maz Katana’s (Lupita Nyong’o) watering hole that reminded me of the cantina scene in A New Hope. It was shocking that an element of the set design would play a crucial part in how the story eventually unfolded which provided a nice twist.

TFA4

What probably stood out the most was how well the story was put together by Lawrence Kasdan. The writer is best known for his work on The Empire Strikes Back and The Return Of The Jedi. Kasdan developed a script that took the franchise back to a simpler time and away for silted intricate scripts of the prequels. Lucas in the prequels concentrated on telling his story, Kasdan, on the other hand, focused on creating an entertaining story. Let’s not forget Kasdan wrote some of Lucas’s most celebrated movies. He knows how to get the audience invested in the well being of the characters and Star Wars: The Force Awakens is no exception. We anguish with Rey (Daisy Ridley) as she hopes for the return of her family as much as we cheer on Finn ( John Boyega) as he decides to join the resistance. You will get goosebumps when Han Solo boards the Millennium Falcon for the first time in a long time. There will even be a section of the crowd who will feel feel for Kylo Ren (Adam Driver) as you sense the conflict in his voice.

TFA2

The musical scores in Star Wars: The Force Awakens can be summed in one phrase “ John Freaking Williams.” It wouldn’t be a Star Wars film without the musical talents of Mr. Williams, and his skills enhance the strong script. It just seems that no matter what is occurring, Williams has a way of embodying the moment in a simple melody or musical interlude that can take what appears to be a “simple” scene and transform into something powerful.

Speaking of something powerful, Star Wars: The Force Awakens is jammed with tremendous performances from a litany of cast members. Harrison Ford does what he does as Han Solo. Ridley is the perfect actress to play Rey. She did such a fantastic job I can’t envision another actor every playing her role. The same can be said for Finn ( John Boyega), Poe ( Oscar Issac), and Kylo Ren (Adam Driver). It seems that Abrams is starting a brand new generation of legends and their performances live up to the hype.

TFA1

Lastly, if you haven’t noticed yet, I’ve made it a point to not include any major plot points (trust me, I know too much ) in this review. To experience the film properly, you need to go into this movie spoiler free. Let this film wash over you like a wave and it will only enhance your experience and I so hope that everyone can have that same experience that I had.

Overall, it’s very rare that a film can live up to enormous expectations let alone exceed them, but Star Wars: The Force Awakens does just that. Abrams succeeds where Lucas failed, and that’s in bringing us back to a simpler time where a blonde haired boy on Tatooine first learned the ways of the force. This movie reminds us why we love Star Wars. I am watching this film and get emotional as the wonderful memories of my late dad buying me the Millennium Falcon for Christmas come back. This movie will take you back and have you believing in the movie magic we once saw in Star Wars and have you wishing you could go to a galaxy .. far.. far.. away.

Monkeys Fighting Robots Youtube

Reactions to ‘Star Wars: The Force Awakens’

Monkeys Fighting Robots

The crew at Monkeys Fighting Robots jumped in front of the camera two-minutes after watching Star Wars: The Force Awakens with candid reactions. T.M. Powell the media critic for CW 44 in Tampa made a guest appearance.

These are spoiler-free comments.

The seventh film in the Star Wars franchise is set up to have a recording setting weekend. Advance ticket sales for Star Wars: The Force Awakens have crossed $100 million in North America, according to sources at The Hollywood Reporter.

Let us know what you thought of the film in the comment section below.

Monkeys Fighting Robots Youtube

Ex-NFL Player To Bring Comic Books To Apple TV

Monkeys Fighting Robots

Athlitacomics, the entertainment company started by former Chicago Bear Israel Idonije, is launching The Protectors issues #1-5 as Motion Books on the Madefire app and on Apple TV. Season 1 of The Protectors will roll out as weekly episodes. The release of the 15 episodes will start Wednesday, December 16 and will continue through March 23.

The Protectors, created by Idonije, written by Ron Marz, with art by Bart Sears, Mark Pennington, and Neeraj Menon, is a unique melding of sports action and superhero adventure with a very diverse character base. The Protectors issues #0 and #1 first debuted as limited, collectible print editions at C2E2 in Chicago. Issue #0 is already available on Madefire.

“Bringing The Protectors to life and offering the story as Motion Books on Madefire and Apple TV is beyond exciting,” said Idonije, CEO of Athlitacomics. “The limited print introduction of issues #0 and #1 was well received, and we appreciate our fans who have been awaiting the rest of the story. We are thrilled to share the first story arc with the world.”

The Protectors is one of two Athlitacomics properties created by Idonije.

“Athlitacomics presents an exceptional example of the power of Motion Books, combining – as they do – the spectacle of sport with super-heroic action! And it’s fantastic to see their work on Apple TV, bringing it into the family space – really the ideal place to enjoy their brand of high-octane entertainment for all ages,” said Liam Sharp CCO and Co-Founder, Madefire.

Idonije, who originally conceived the idea of The Protectors during a Bears training camp a few years ago, is a lifelong comic book fan. The Protectors are chosen athletes who learn they are blessed with more than elite athletic ability. Pro football superstar Isaac Chike seems to have the perfect life of success, wealth and fame. But this life is turned upside down when he discovers his true purpose. Isaac learns he is destined to be one of The Protectors, a small group of gifted heroes blessed with miraculous powers. Now Isaac and a handful of other star athletes must choose between the lives they know as star athletes and the greater good of protecting mankind from enemies intent on enslaving the world.

Season 1 will introduce the characters, concepts and conflicts, recount the origin of The Protectors, and take the reader through the first battle with the Dissenters. The series is filled with character-driven drama and extraordinary visuals that appeal to both sports fans and comic enthusiasts.

The Protectors

Source: Athlitacomics

Monkeys Fighting Robots Youtube

Review: Into The Badlands Episode Five “Snake Creeps Down”

Monkeys Fighting Robots

Threads are coming together in the fifth episode of Into The Badlands. Sunny (Daniel Wu) is still pondering the offer made by the River King.  Bring him the head of M.K. and Sunny, along with a pregnant Vail, will be granted passage out of the Badlands. The Widow is offering sanctuary, freedom, and food to the Cogs she took from Quinn’s fields in exchange for loyalty. Meanwhile Jade has convinced Quinn to use part of the Clipper force for the upcoming poppy harvest, much to Lydia’s protest, and his headaches have become worse.

Quinn and the Clippers - Into The Badlands
Quinn addresses the Clippers – Into The Badlands
Photo: AMC Networks

Sunny and M.K. continue their search for The Widow while The Widow continues her search for the boy with power. Tilda has been lying about who M.K. really is as it has been revealed that if M.K. is not trained to control his power, he will die. Ryder pays a visit to Waldo, still looking to better his position, and hoping to have Waldo’s loyalty if things were to change at the Fort. Waldo advises Ryder to pay a visit to his grandfather Penrith (a solid guest appearance by Lance Henriksen). Penrith is a preacher of sorts and father to Lydia, he is still resentful of Lydia marrying Quinn and also appears to be looking for M.K., referring to him as a “dark one”.

Lydia seems to want to make peace with Jade by pitching in with the poppy harvest. It is a nice moment at first, but seems rather forced. It doesn’t last long as later, when Jade goes to see Quinn she drops to the floor and appears to have some sort of seizure.

Tilda has come across Sunny and M.K. while they have been searching for The Widow’s current hideout. Tilda attempts to warn M.K. about what his power can do to him and the tender moment is short lived when Sunny shows up, taking Tilda prisoner and demanding the location of The Widow. Leaving a piece of Tilda’s jacket with a dagger that bears Quinn’s sigil, this episode is about to give the audience what is has been wanting since the first episode.

Sunny versus The Widow.

But first, Sunny reports back to Quinn, and Quinn commands Sunny that he is to no longer see Vail. Quinn also orders Sunny to torture Tilda until she reveals where The Widow has been hiding. Making her way into the Fort by clandestine means, the Widow has come to reclaim her daughter. Showcasing one of the best fighting sequences to date, Sunny and The Widow battle through the Fort’s dungeon. Employing a number of weapons between them as the fight ends up in the armory, the show is setting a very high bar with these action sequences, and they keep delivering. The battle is fast, powerful, and ends with Sunny getting the upper hand slightly when he wounds the Widow.  He is not able to finish her as M.K. has unleashed his powers to save Tilda from another Colt. Tilda makes her escape with The Widow, Sunny has lost their trail, and Quinn has seen the whole thing.

Another solid episode right before the season finale, with progression for all the characters, next week’s finale is a must watch. The addition of Lance Henriksen as Penrith and the inclusion of Lydia’s past definitely gives her another dimension outside of jealous wife, and Ryder has taken his father’s lessons about seizing power to heart.

Into The Badlands airs Sunday nights at 9pm EST on AMC Networks, and has been renewed for a second season.

 

 

 

 

Monkeys Fighting Robots Youtube

Bask in The Glory of Ennio Morricone’s ‘The Hateful Eight’ Overture

Monkeys Fighting Robots

Quentin Tarantino has teamed up with Ennio Morricone to score The Hateful Eight, the first time the director has opted not to compile his own eclectic soundtrack. Now, the score overlaying the opening go the film, the overture, is available to hear online. And sample again and again, and maybe just keep on a continuous loop leading up to when you can see the film.

Here is the overture:

The score has everything. It has doom and dread, grand sweeping gestures, and that wonderful Ennio Morricone touch to match Tarantino’s spectacular vision.

The Hateful Eight will be released in its special Roadshow 70mm edition Christmas Day, with an expanded release December 31. You can purchase tickets to the Roadshow here if you’re within range of one of these theaters/cities.

Monkeys Fighting Robots Youtube

REVIEW: Boruto: Naruto the movie – A great epilogue to the franchise

Monkeys Fighting Robots

Summary: With Naruto as the Seventh Hokage, Hidden Leaf Village is planning to host the Chunin Exams to train new shinobi from the village and from their allied villages. Among the entrants are Sasuke’s daughter, Sarada, Mitsuki, an exceptionally talented yet mysterious shinobi…And Boruto, Naruto’s talented but impetuous son.

The film starts off with a Q & A segment which was filmed at this year’s New York Comic Con where Naruto series creator, Masashi Kishimoto and the voice actress behind Naruto, Junko Takeuchi took questions from the audience. They ranged from “What do you think of your characters going on this new chapter in their lives?” to Takeuchi being asked “What was it like playing a father figure to Boruto?” to which the voice actress replied, “I’m a girl so I don’t know what’s like to be a father.” After this segment, which people could have easily seen on Youtube (here is the link if you’re interested), the movie got started and made up for the padding from this opening segment.

If it’s not already clear, this review will has a SPOILER WARNING for the entire Naruto series. This should be obvious as the series is about Naruto’s son and is taking place after the end of the manga and anime (which as of this review has yet to be animated to completion). Just giving you a heads up as it’s really impossible to talk about the movie without making comparisons to the original story.
boruto 2
In this new future wherein the original cast has now grown up, gotten married, and had kids, a great deal of world building takes place. The hidden leaf village is much more advance than it once was, complete with computers, video games, and wrist devices which shoots out ninja moves stored on tiny scrolls.

In this more advanced future, series protagonist Naruto has become a workaholic who doesn’t have time for his kids. His son, Boruto is less than understanding of his father’s situation and takes training under his dad’s former rival, Sasuke to train him for the sole purpose of taking his dad down. Sounds a bit harsh, but it’s amusing to watch Boruto undertake his own path to become a warrior, even if it’s just to get his dad to notice him.

Fans have been quick to harshly judge Naruto from the early rumors which circulate around this film. Yes, he may have become a workaholic who has to send his Shadow Clones to important events and have them disappear on him at the worst possible moment but don’t be so quick to dismiss him without taking the time to watch this film.

Through the course of the film it becomes apparent to Naruto he hasn’t given his son the time he deserves and Boruto himself hasn’t taken the time to understand where his dad is coming from. There is a particular moment which truly reflects the disconnect the two are experiencing where Naruto is in his son’s room trying to find the words to give him encouragement but doesn’t know what to say because he never had parents growing up. It’s a quiet scene but one fans secretly hope for which help to show characters bonding between the countless battle which can occur in fighting anime like Dragonball Z or Bleach.
boruto 4
If you’re more focused on the action, you should know there is plenty to spare. Once the villains from the opening scene finally return (they really are absent for most of the film), Naruto is able to cut loose and showcase just how strong he truly is, impressing his son and the audience. Also, there is a father and son Rasengan attack the fans are really going to enjoy. Also, there is after credit sequence which is particularly entertaining.

It should be again noted this film is an epilogue to the original series and runs the risk of spoilers for original series. Also, the villains are tied to the previous film, The Last: Naruto The Movie so see it is also helpful to understand who the villains are. Basically, if you didn’t finish the manga, are only watching the anime, and didn’t see the last film, you may have to wait a bit before watching this one. Unless, you don’t care for spoilers.

Though fans are quick to judge the new spin on the characters and are still probably annoyed some of their personal favorite pairings didn’t end up together, the movie does offer a lot of heart, action, and nods to the series fans have been enjoying for over a decade. For all the Naruto fans out there, this is a movie you owe it to yourself to check out.
boruto 3

Monkeys Fighting Robots Youtube

Captain America Civil War International Trailer Released

Monkeys Fighting Robots

Captain America Civil War is just one of many superhero films expected to dominate the box office in 2016. The film based on the Mark Millar comic event series had a smash trailer released a few weeks ago, and now Marvel has released the first international trailer for Captain America’s latest adventure.

The trailer is one minute thirty seconds long, has barely any new footage, and doesn’t really explain the plot any further. Hopefully the next trailer will reveal more about the story, and why all the Marvel superheroes are fighting each other But, the trailer still revs up the excitement for the newest Marvel production. Captain America Civil War will be released May 6, 2016.

Marvel’s “Captain America: Civil War” finds Steve Rogers leading the newly formed team of Avengers in their continued efforts to safeguard humanity. But after another incident involving the Avengers results in collateral damage, political pressure mounts to install a system of accountability, headed by a governing body to oversee and direct the team. The new status quo fractures the Avengers, resulting in two camps—one led by Steve Rogers and his desire for the Avengers to remain free to defend humanity without government interference, and the other following Tony Stark’s surprising decision to support government oversight and accountability.

Monkeys Fighting Robots Youtube

Kurt Russell To Play Star Lord’s Father In ‘Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2’

Monkeys Fighting Robots

Nerds around the world just squealed at the possibility of Kurt Russell entering the Marvel Cinematic Universe. The Wrap is reporting Kurt Russell has emerged as James Gunn‘s choice to play Chris Pratt‘s father in Marvel’s Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, according to multiple individuals familiar with the film’s casting process.

The report also states that a meeting between Marvel and Russell is expected to happen soon, but Russell yet to read for the part.

Gunn has yet to comment on the rumor.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 begins production in early 2016 with an expected released date of May 5, 2017.

The film is written and directed by James Gunn and stars Bradley Cooper, Chris Pratt, Dave Bautista, Michael Rooker, Vin Diesel, Zoe Saldana, and Pom Klementieff.

Monkeys Fighting Robots Youtube

40 Ounces of Freedom! ‘Lagunitas Sucks’ Review

Monkeys Fighting Robots

Because What’s More American than the Over Consumption of Mediocrity?

Just to be extra clear, I don’t believe ‘Lagunitas’ sucks, it’s just the name of their holiday beer, which is a “Brown Sugga’ Substitute Ale.”  It has an O.G. of 1.085, an I.B.U. of 63.21, and and alcoholic content of 8%.  I only understand what the alcohol content means, but hey, I’m ready to drink.

Unnecessary Rules:

  1. I must keep the alcohol in the bottle I purchased it in!
  2. I must finish the bottle, unless I puke.
  3. There are no time limits. I will enjoy this one.
  4. I deserve a real beer, at least that’s what I tell myself.
  5. I can change or add rules, as I please.

BONUS:  I also bought a six pack of Shock Top: Twisted Pretzel Wheat for my father, and I indulged in one.  It was okay. The pretzel-caramel flavor comes and goes with various sips.  After all, it is Shock Top, which is generally considered mediocre, so there was no surprise.  In fact, my quart (32 fl. oz.) of ‘Lagunitas Sucks’ cost the same as the six pack.

The hype on this beer is almost as high as the new STAR WARS and I decided to treat myself to counteract my self-loathing.  You know, like any normal rational human does! Seriously though, check out these reviews from Beer Advocate and Rate Beer! They make this beer out like it’s a nectar from the gods.

The first sip is delightfully bitter, hoppy, and fruity. It’s I.P.A.-esque, which is not my favorite type of beer; however, I do enjoy some of the Lagunitas brand.  The label says to “…share this one with an amigo!,” but the jokes on them cause I’m alone.  There is another slogan on the label in bold, which reads: “LIFE IS UNCERTAIN. DON’T SIP.” Holy crap, this beer gets me.  It’s got self-deprecating humour AND it continues to taste pleasant after every drink, which was not the case for my past reviews.  If this beer was a person, I’d date it, but then dump it because I’d want to see other beers.  That’s not a metaphor for dating, it’s a metaphor for alcohol.  

Alright…despite me going off the rails, this beer is actually top notch.  It’s really smooth and enjoyable.  Even as I gulp down the entire bottle, it’s not making me feel nauseous, or lightheaded.  It just feels and tastes good. I’m quite happy with this choice.

Very happy!

Monkeys Fighting Robots Youtube